Mood:Mellow
Song of Choice:"Take it all" by Trust Company
Topic: Let's talk about Love
Days That Have Passed Since I sent Eric's Letter: 4 Weeks and 6 day
Days Until Spring Break:42
Stolen News Article FACT OR FICITON?!?!
Guess what? We can lead happy lives without ever finding our true soul mates. A recent study by the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology says that we simply need to believe we’ve found them.
In fact, "Satisfaction [in a romantic relationship] seems to require leaving some assumptions about similarity untested and unquestioned," say the authors of the study, Sandra L. Murray of the State University of New York at Buffalo and her associates.
How it works
You develop an attraction to someone. To nurture that attraction, you create a web of — well, let's call them rationalizations — that support and perpetuate your belief that he or she is "The One." These rationalizations enable you to attach great significance to sharing a favorite song, travel destination or pizza topping. So much significance, in fact, that you ignore your inevitable differences, treating them as mere distractions.
Why do I love you?
“Because I just do," as my oldest nephew used to say before he grew too cool for such nonsense. Or, as Emily Dickinson put it, "The heart wants what it wants." And the heart, unlike the brain, doesn't need to do more than that.
It's a kind of romantic spin on Descartes, if you want to get all philosophical about it. "I think we are soul mates, therefore we are." It wouldn't work under any other set of circumstances, but this is that sweetest of all cases in which self-delusion can become self-fulfilling prophesy — and can bring happiness to all parties involved. You can't argue with that!
I don't know what you make of this, but it's fabulous news for me. Now I no longer have to be the woman of John Cusack's dreams. I just have to make him think I am.
Song of Choice:"Take it all" by Trust Company
Topic: Let's talk about Love
Days That Have Passed Since I sent Eric's Letter: 4 Weeks and 6 day
Days Until Spring Break:42
Stolen News Article FACT OR FICITON?!?!
Guess what? We can lead happy lives without ever finding our true soul mates. A recent study by the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology says that we simply need to believe we’ve found them.
In fact, "Satisfaction [in a romantic relationship] seems to require leaving some assumptions about similarity untested and unquestioned," say the authors of the study, Sandra L. Murray of the State University of New York at Buffalo and her associates.
How it works
You develop an attraction to someone. To nurture that attraction, you create a web of — well, let's call them rationalizations — that support and perpetuate your belief that he or she is "The One." These rationalizations enable you to attach great significance to sharing a favorite song, travel destination or pizza topping. So much significance, in fact, that you ignore your inevitable differences, treating them as mere distractions.
Why do I love you?
“Because I just do," as my oldest nephew used to say before he grew too cool for such nonsense. Or, as Emily Dickinson put it, "The heart wants what it wants." And the heart, unlike the brain, doesn't need to do more than that.
It's a kind of romantic spin on Descartes, if you want to get all philosophical about it. "I think we are soul mates, therefore we are." It wouldn't work under any other set of circumstances, but this is that sweetest of all cases in which self-delusion can become self-fulfilling prophesy — and can bring happiness to all parties involved. You can't argue with that!
I don't know what you make of this, but it's fabulous news for me. Now I no longer have to be the woman of John Cusack's dreams. I just have to make him think I am.
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